A cover-up emotion.
It might be grief. Or it might be fear, or shame, or guilt, or any of a wide variety of other disempowering emotions. (See the left side of the Feelings Wheel). The point is, unless and until you probe your anger you’ll never know. You may be satisfied with raging; or the high blood pressure and chronic disease that often results from burying regular angry feelings.
Of course, it’s pretty common for men to express anger. Because they’ve been conditioned by society to ignore, hide, repress and deny any other feelings that might threaten their Marlboro Man image. That’s a plain unhealthy perspective. Of course, when a woman expresses anger men tend to label her a b*tch.
Sitting with your anger – doing the inner excavation work to discover if it’s really anger or something else entirely – is a step toward greater emotional intelligence. It allows you to deal with the underlying issues, rather than keep them buried in every cell of your body. And that, my friend, is liberating. It allows you to drop forever the burden of anger you’ve been carrying.
For personal exercises and practices in the inner exploration journey, get my book: Upgrade Your Lifestyle: 10 Keys to Unlock a Steady State of Happiness.